Things that go beep in the night!

Cartoon by media.rd.com




I am so tired of things that beep, beep, beep. I swear, if one more electronic appliance thing beeps at me, I might just grab a gun and plug it. Just like Booth did on Bones when he shot the ice cream truck clown. This has not been a good appliance week, folks! I blame Stud Muffin, because he's been out of town for a few weeks.

It started two weeks ago. I went into Studly 's office to walk on the treadmill. Beep, Beep, Beep. The smoke detector wanted new batteries. Fine. Got out my last two 9 volt batteries and replaced the two in that room. Bought more batteries and replaced all the other ones in the house so they wouldn't go off in the middle of the night. I hate that!

Then there is the washing machine. It doesn't want to fill with water and quietly go about its business. It wants to beep at me and tell me "F1" which I am sure is graphic machine swearing. It wants me to have to stand next to it and clear the profanity 3 or 4 times to get the cycle started, and then stand around when it wants to rinse and push the button some more. It took 2 1/2 weeks to get a replacement valve, cuz they didn't sell very many of these fancy-pants Whirlpool washers, so nobody has replacement parts. Finally got one, but after the guy put it in, the problem (and the song) remains the same. Can't wait to find out how much the next repair part will cost, and if anyone has one.

Washer and replaced valve

In the middle of the night... more beeping. I ran to the middle of the house trying to locate the annoying sound and found that my oven had turned itself on. Well, it started to turn itself on. It wanted me to press "start" so it could start heating. But at 3 AM, there is nothing I really want to bake. Pressing "clear" only stopped the beeping for a moment, and we were back at it. Finally had to shut the whole oven off at the circuit breaker. It even starts this routine when it is already baking something!!! Stupid, stupid little machine! Repair guy says it needs a whole new control panel... at least $150 dollars, plus his time, of course.

The same oven that blew out its own window early in our life together!

"Push Start, push start, push..."

Last night, after disconnecting the oven and silencing the washer, I sat in my chair to study and watch a little television (Yeah, don't start with me.) The next thing I knew... "What is that beeping?!?" It was the friggin' weather radio telling me about thunderstorms in some county I didn't even know existed. I'm telling you, the next appliance to make a peep is going to get it!! I'll tell the repairman that it shot itself.

In other news... I got my acceptance letter to the nursing program! Guess my scores were good enough. Now I need to go to a 4 hour orientation where they tell us about the drug test and background checks that are required before we can start. All I can say is, none of that had better beep!!