Sister Hand Grenade of Patience

That's the signature line of a woman who posts on a message forum I read. I like it. At times it describes me perfectly. I want it (done) and I want it (done) now!

So, I've gotten into a work routine lately:

Wake up, or rather be woken up by large doggies rooting around under my pillow, bouncing my head up and down until I fall out of bed. Peel open at least one eye, grunt at Stud Muffin, feed horrid wake up dogs, and make a cup of coffee. Get inpatient (and not for the last time, no doubt) that the coffee takes too long to brew. Snag a cup anyway and choke on how bitter the first inch or so in the pot it.

Stare mindlessly at email until both eyes are open, if not looking in the same direction. Grunt some more at Stud Muffin and aim a kiss in his direction. Send him off to work.

Throw on dirty gardening clothes (since I'm only going to get dirtier!) and head outside with canine helpers. Pick a flower bed, grab my over sized blue bucket tub and weed poking thingy and start jabbing at the Bermuda grass that has taken over said flower bed. {Note: After a nuclear attack, the only things to survive will be cockroaches and Bermuda grass!}

Perhaps this one?

Or maybe this?

Ignore dog with orange squeaky toy until she leaves it under my bum when I reach for more hateful weeds. Fling toy for the eighth hundred time this morning. Wrench and tear at grass until bucket is full or my back has seize up, drag bucket to compost pile and fling the whole thing into compost bin.



Retrieve blue bucket tub.



Decide I am too tired to properly stow the tools so I leave them.... wherever. Admire my accomplishment and sigh at what remains.

Peeled back grass from here yesterday.

Ripped out grass and dinky shrubs, replanted and mulched here today.

Kick at stray mulch as I struggle into house. Start the shower and realize that it is only 9:30 AM and I am ready for a nap.

Run various errands in town, come home whooped to dogs who have been sleeping and are now ready to play. Pretend to "keep house." (MIL: Stop nodding your head!)

Go to studio and start sewing produce bags or whatever. Sew until dogs want dinner. Pretend to have idea for dinner for Stud Muffin. Make something up for dinner. Collapse in front of TV with Stud Muffin until eyes start closing and head is bobbing around on neck. Go to bed. Start all over again.

Okay, so that's my schedule these days! To date, I have sold 78 produce bags, with 9 more on reserve. Since I clearly have nothing else to do, I thought I would add something new, but want opinions first.




These are some reusable bulk food bags I made today. They are made of rip stop nylon, lined, with an attached ribbon tie. I made a set of three sizes, for buying bulk food like flour, grains, nuts, seasonings, or whatever else.



You can even fold them up and store them in the smallest bag!



Okay, so what do we think? If I had a Whole Foods Market around here, I would use these. You think these are a viable product??

Oh, and since using crochet hooks to hold my eyes open at night didn't work, I made this.



As my friend MarmiteToasty, the naughty wench, says, "Enough twaddle for today!"

I did it myself!!

Over the winter, I shut off the water to the vegetable garden. Or I thought I did until one frozen night when one of the sprinklers in the raised beds cracked. The next day when the sun warmed things up, water, water spraying everywhere!! I found out that I hadn't closed the valve just that leeetle bit more.

Now this wasn't a problem; I would just have the landscaper replace the setup when he came to do my other work. Of course the road debacle put the landscaping on indefinite hold, but I was still going to need the water turned back on!

So I did what any other farmer wannabe would do. I hit the Home Depot for some do-it-yourself parts! I got help from my visiting plumber cutting off the offending sprinkler.

Turns out most of these parts are cracked!

What's left in the raised bed. Oh, and a tomato plant saying Hi.

I probably looked like a dork walking through HD with this entire pipe contraption, but I held my head high, and my pipe like a weapon! It took about a half hour and help from a plumbing guy with a tall ladder to gather the required replacement parts.

Not shown... a ten foot length of PVC pipe.

This morning, I put it all together with PVC primer and PVC cement.

Won't win any beauty contests, but it works!!

TaDa!!

Okay, so I got as much glue on me as on the parts, and had to go run errands with bright blue cement on my hands like I dipped my fingers in the ink well!

And if anyone comments on my blue fingers, I can smugly say, "Oh yeah... I was just doing some PVC repair work!"

Welcome to Sleepytown

I went to the dump today, well, it's actually a "recycling center", not a dump. We don't have any trash pickup out here in the sticks, so you have to take it yourself. Anyway, the dump has a new trash compactor. A second compactor! I asked the sanitation dude about it and he said we had "grown up" enough to need another trash masher.

Outside of the "big" dump.

New compactor to the right, cardboard trailer in the middle, and old compactor on the left.

Now, my girls will probably tell you (or anyone else listening) that we live, not in Sleepytown, but Punytown or Nowheresville. Not Quite Grown questioned the variety of experiences in my life when I got excited about the town getting a third traffic light. And that got me thinking. I should share some of my little town with the greater population. And so, I took some pictures today about "town." Granted, they aren't very good, but I was trying to stay in my own lane while snapping away!

So, at the start of Main Street, is Simmons Lumber, where everyone knows your name, and you can actually buy stuff "on account." Notice all the traffic in my side-view mirror.

And in case you haven't believed me in the past, the large market here is in fact, the Piggly Wiggly ("Shop the Pig!")



Being a small town, businesses have to multi-task to weather the economy. Here is an insurance company that also sells tombstone markers in the front yard!



The video rental place also doubles as the tanning salon!



The trophy shop is the only place to get office services like faxing and copying!



This used to be a sewing store that, in the year that I have lived wasn't open even once! It just got a new owner!



Curious combination of services!

I tried to get a shot of Snookum's Beef House (and self storage!) but there was a cop behind me so I didn't think stopping in the middle of Main Street was a good idea. Besides my hands were full.

Whoa! Where'd that come from??

Shot of the main part of Main Street, with our choices for fine dining!

In addition to McD's And Burger King, the third place literally next door to the other two is Jack's, for fried chicken.



Jack's is always packed, especially at breakfast, when you can get a pork chop and gravy on a biscuit. I can't even imagine that for breakfast, and I'll eat almost anything!

Of course, we have the county courthouse, where you get your driver's license, car registration, pay your property taxes, all by walking into the county clerk's office. No lines, no take-a-number. Just Johnny and his staff, who never ask for ID even when notarizing documents.



At some point, we had a bookstore, but no more.



The store next door looks even worse. Somebody stole everything but the front windows!



Okay, so we are really just an ordinary small town. I like the pace and the fact that people get to recognize you about town. Heck, my electrician almost ran me over in the Walmart parking lot! Instead, he waved and said hey!!

We have a Winner!

Photo by dieselbug2007

I am shocked by the large number of comments to my anniversary blog post! Okay, there were 18 comments, but I left some, Penny left more than one, and Marmitetoasty must be seeing double on her drugs! So if you eliminate all the duplicates (and mine) we have 10 unique posters!

Using HPFM (okay, I used a random number generator thingie) the winning number is ... 7!... Thimbleanna, come on down! You are the next contestant on The Price is Right!!! Oops, wrong channel.

Photo by kcadams

Thimbleanna must have seen into the future when she wrote,

You're so funny. So, if there are only 2 of us who read this blog, does that mean all those comments are from the other person? And that I have a 50% chance of winning LOL!!!

Alrighty then, the rest of you are free to go and are safe from getting my "stuff." Thimbleanna, however, is going to have to email me her address (to LisaAlso (at) aol (dot )com) so I can unload some of my "creative endeavors" (and I am using air quotes here) on her doorstep!

Thanks for playing along! At the rate at which I seem to jabber, my 200th post will be here in no time and we might get to do this again!!

The early bird...

gets the bird from Mother Nature!

Or in my case... frozen tomaters!



The heinous Goddess of my gardening world backhanded me for starting a day or two early moving the tomato seedlings into the real world!



I lovingly planted and fed them, erected row covers to protect them, and worked to secure the row covers in tornado strength winds. I watered by hand, since my sprinklers are out of commission. I TALKED TO THEM, FOR GOD'S SAKE!!



This is so embarrassing!

My friends at St Brigid Farm, Sugar Mountain Farm, and The Barefoot Gardener are going to take away all my Princess Gardener points! (*Snap!*)

I'm not happy. Mother Nature is laughing at me! And then She felt a little bit bad, and has been trying to make it up to me.

Steve has new finery.

A new pear growing.


I'm not ready to forgive Her yet. Maybe I will if some of the crispy tomatoes recover and start growing anyway. In the meantime, I'm going to pout!

Okay...(shake it off, shake it off!) I have started my very own sweat shop sewing produce bags, except I'm the only one sweating. Is that how it is suppose to work?!?



It seems as fast as I can list the veggie bags on Etsy, they get snapped up! Nice problem to have, but, as I told Penny, I might have to hire myself a wife!

Don't forget to leave a comment on my anniversary post for a chance to win a bunch of junk really cool stuff from me! I will use HPFM on Sunday night to determine the unlucky poster winner!

100th post giveaway!!

In keeping with Blogging tradition, I will commemorate the fact that you all have egged me on now for 100 posts. Considering I didn't start this blog until October, I guess I really do talk too much!

So, we will have a drawing for some yet to be determined goodies from yours truly!! There might be some of these:

Okay, oranges not included!

Or something like this:

Maybe not exactly like this!

Or maybe something I've never shown you before!! There might even be something that I bought or stole, you never know!

All you have to do is leave a comment on this post by, let's see...(it's Thursday, and I only know of 2 people who read this blog, and one of them I pay to read it, so surely they will have read this by the weekend) Sunday night!! I will take the two comments left, mix them up between my hands and have the dogs pick a hand! If there are more than two entries in this drawing, I will do something much more mathematical, involving HPFM (Hocus Pocus F*cking Magic,) to determine the winner!!

{Edit: Oh yeah! Small shop update with new stuff!}

Post number 99 1/2

{Edit: Oh that Penny, she's so fast! She's already snapped up this set of veggie bags! I promise I will get more made ASAP!}

{Edit, Edit: Stud Muffin has suggested that if anyone wants to pre-order a set of 3 veggie bags (or multiples of 3) @ $6 a set plus shipping, to let me know and tell me what color scheme you'd like for the raw edge leaves. I hope to have them ready to send out or list by the end of the week.}

Okay, this really isn't my 100th post. I just wanted to say that I have added one set of three reusable produce bags to the shop.



I made six bags today, but Penny gets the first set since I stole her idea of a fabric leaf shape to finish off the end of the drawstring ribbon. I will be making more sets of these as soon as I get some more netting!!

Fun in the mailbox!

It is always fun to go to the mailbox and not find a bunch of bills! It's even better when you receive something you bought on Etsy! My friend Penny from Sew Take A Hike makes the neatest shopping totes that roll up and snap close to make them go-anywhere bags!

See the great bookmark lying on the bag?

I picked out a fun green bag, lined with a spunky yellow flower print. I just love it!

Better representation of the colors.

And it typical Penny fashion, she included a quilted pear bookmark which she also sells in her Etsy shop. Go check it out, she just put in a dreamy aqua crocheted market tote that I am drooling over!!

I took my new shopping tote with me to the Kroger store yesterday, as well as some net vegetable bags I made!



I think I really like these reusable produce bags! They don't weigh anything, can be seen through and are washable! I feel so green!

I haven't really gotten any sewing done, but I have been de-constructing this old quilt I got at the junk man's store.

Not very good pictures, sorry!



This quilt wasn't in very good shape, but had some really cute blocks made out of old feed sacks. Each block has been handsewn, but the blocks were machine sewn together. Altogether the quilt was very busy, but I have plans brewing for individual blocks, because they are just so neat!





I had some more pictures of single blocks, but (*shaking the camera*) they are stuck in the camera! I think (*shake, shake*) that the battery corrupted some of the files, and since this is a PG rated blog, (*shaking harder!) I can't show corrupted photos!

Oh! And by the way! I am such a lippy broad, that my next post will be my 100th, so I will be coming up with a commemorative giveaway!! Til then....

Road repair funds acquired!

{Edit: I have had to enable the word verification function because I was receiving Spam comments. Please type the letters shown in the comments box in order to post your comments. Thanks!}

Well, who knew you could actually sell a kidney on Ebay!

Okay, it was wasn't mine, it was Stud Muffin's kidney.

Photo by bornazombie.

Oh alright, it wasn't a kidney, but Stud Muffin really came through.

To raise the money to fix the washed out road, Stud Muffin sold his beloved red Corvette!

{Okay, I've been trying to upload pictures that he sent me of his car, but they just won't load!! He tried emailing them to me, but that didn't work either, and he said %*^%# and @#!!(*^%$#, so just imagine, will you!}

Kinda like this, but this isn't it! Photo by Momboleum

Before you worry about him giving up his "baby," this is the fourth Corvette he has own over the years. And it was completely his idea to sell it! My hero! I told him he could get another red car. I have my eye on this one! It's fits right in our budget!

Photo by Mark Wubben.

We are still going to get another opinion on fixing the road. We got a name from Tiny's secretary at the county highway department. I just have to call the guy.

I have been working in the garden, even using Tilly the Tiller today. She works hard and is doing a great job considering the fact that I'm tilling previously unbroken ground full of root and sticks and rocks.

I also transplanted some of the tomatoes into the raised beds, but since we are expecting thunderstorms and then some very cool nights, I have covered them with row covers for now. Pictures later.

The dogs, of course, help me when I garden. Since I showed Dirty Nick pictures last time, here are some of Sassy "working" her blue toy over.



Shaking the life out of it!

Other than that, and the usual dust buffalo roundup, I have been working on a design for a tote that folds into it's own pocket, with help and opinions from Penny. I'm still working on some modifications, but this is what I have so far.