Monday, November 17, 2008

Oh, man!!

I was (almost) so busted!!

I ran errands this morning, after Stud Muffin helped me take the trash to the dump. Nothing much to report, except I paid $1.83 for gas with my grocery store wavy thing.

I returned home with lots to do. The clouds are coming in and the temperature will drop to 25*F tonight! That's cold folks! I'll be shivering in my hula skirt.

So, anyway, I needed to get in some more firewood and mow (at least) the backyard to get rid of as much fruit from the Squirtwood tree as I could hit with the mower. Sassy barfed twice last night at 1:15 AM. I want these suckers gone, I say!

I mowed. The backyard and both side yards. When I returned the mower to the shop, however, my cell phone was nowhere to be found. I had put it in my pants pocket, so that if I drove off of a cliff into the forest or I mowed over a snake, I could call Stud Muffin so at least he could laugh at me. How could I explain that I lost my phone, in my own yard?!?

Check around the mower in the shop. No phone. Sh*t! Okay, drive the buggy over all the lawns I've mowed and pray feverishly that I don't compound the problem by running the dang thing over. Horrible visions of my pretty lavender Razr phone lying amongst the leaves in pieces after I mowed over it flash before my eyes.

Photo by jasonbaeder

Photo by kozumel

What if Studly won't buy me another new phone? What if I have to carry this old thing around?

Photo by Say, does this phone make my butt look fat?

I mow over things all the time. Walnuts, sticks, snakes. Some of them make horrific noises and shoot out in pieces. So, how could I find just where the phone squeezed out of my pocket like a Push-Pop? Driving around wasn't getting the job done. I got the house phone, started calling myself and walked outside.

There! I heard it! Singing away somewhere in the backyard! Hopefully, NOT covered in Squirtwood fruit!




There you are!!

Safe and sound, singing right along.

Whew! Okay. My heart rate is returning to normal.

And we won't tell Studly that I ran around the backyard yelling Marco/Polo into the great forest beyond. That's just between us, right?


barefoot gardener said...


I end up doing that at least once a week. I tease Mr. Barefoot that I married him because his memory is so much better than mine. Well, HE thinks I am teasing. *snort*

Be glad you have a house phone to use when you lose your cell....we got rid of our house line when the teens started racking up HUGE long-distance bills, and never set it back up after they left. I HAVE to admit to hubby when I have misplaced my phone.

Anonymous said...

Kai's cat has taken off with my cell phone and then lays protectively on it...It is HYSTERICAL when I call it and the cat jumps straight up about 4 feet when it rings!


Celticspirit said...

What a funny post. I'm glad you found your phone. I haven't lost mine yet but in the past Russell's run his over with a forklift...more than once. hehehe

MarmiteToasty said...

Im forever loosing me phone and others have to ring it for me to find it LOL...... the problem is when Ive left it in me car and someone rings it the car alarm goes off lol....

Glad ya didnt run yours over with the mower, or worst still, one of your dogs didnt eat it LOL....


Lisa said...

Yep! Found the phone, the dogs didn't eat it or vomit it, I didn't mow or drive over it, and I didn't have to scrape scared cat off of the ceiling!

However, I forgot my camera in the woods this morning when Studly and I cleared a fallen tree from the road with the chainsaw! Had to back and find it!

Ah! Old-Timer's Disease is upon us! (Quit laughing MYS!)

Vegas and/or Chicago Angie said...

Did you get snow? I saw snow flurries in TN.

Anonymous said...

Oh mommy! What I'm I gonna do with you? Well, I'm getting rid of my extremely expensive phone and getting a normal old plan. Sad day :(